Climbing Uphill

When you come home to me

  • When you come home to me
  • I'll wear a sweeter smile
  • And hope that for a while you'll
  • Okay thank you
  • I'm climbing uphill Jamie
  • Climbing uphill
  • I'm up every morning at six
  • And standing in line
  • With two hundred girls
  • Who are younger and thinner than me
  • Who have already been to the gym
  • I'm waiting five hours in line
  • And watching the girls
  • Just coming and going
  • In dresses that look just like this
  • Till my number is finally called
  • When I walk in the room
  • There's a table of men
  • Always men usually gay
  • Who've been sitting like I have
  • And listening all day
  • To two hundred girls
  • Belting as high as they can
  • I am a good person
  • I'm an attractive person
  • I am a talented person
  • Grant me Grace
  • When you come home
  • I should have told them I was sick last week
  • They're gonna think this is the way I sing
  • Why is the pianist playing so loud
  • Should I sing louder
  • I'll sing louder
  • Maybe I should stop and start over
  • I'm gonna stop and start over
  • Why is the director staring at his crotch
  • Look at me
  • Stop looking at that look at me
  • No not at my shoes
  • Don't look at my shoes
  • I hate these stupid shoes
  • Why did I pick these shoes
  • Why did I pick this song
  • Why did I pick this career
  • Why does this pianist hate me
  • If I don't get a callback
  • I can go to Crate and Barrel with mom and buy a couch
  • Not that I want to spend a day with mom
  • But Jamie needs space to write
  • Since I'm obviously such a horrible annoying distraction to him
  • What's he gonna be like when we have kids
  • And once again
  • Why am I working so hard
  • These are the people who cast Linda Blair in a musical
  • Jesus Christ I suck I suck I suck
  • When fin'lly you come home to
  • Thank you
  • Thank you very much
  • I will not be the girl stuck at home in the 'burbs
  • With the baby the dog and the garden of herbs
  • I will not be the girl in the sensible shoes
  • Pushing burgers and beer nuts and missing the clues
  • I will not be the girl who gets asked how it feels
  • To be trotting along at the genius's heels
  • I will not be the girl who requires a man to get by
  • And I
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