Amish Paradise(Parody of "Gangsta's Paradise" by Coolio)
As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
- As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain
- I take a look at my wife and realize shes very plaing
- But that's just perfect for an amish like me
- You know I shun fancy things like electricity
- At 4:30 in the morning I'm milking cows
- Jebediah feeds the chickens and jacob plows fool
- And I've been milking and plowing so long that
- Even ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone
- I'm a man of the land I'm into discipline
- Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin
- But if I finish all of my chores and you finish thine
- Then tonight were gonna party like it's 1699
- We been spending most our lives
- Living in an amish paradise
- I've churned butter once or twice
- Living in an amish paradise
- It's hard work and sacrifice
- Living in an amish paradise
- We sell quilts at a discount price
- Living in an amish paradise
- A local boy kicked me in the butt last week
- I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek
- I really don't care in fact I wish him well
- 'Cause I'll be laughing my head off
- When hes burning in hell
- But I ain't never punched a tourist
- Even if he deserved it
- An amish with a tude
- You know that's unheard of
- I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat
- And my homies agree
- I really look good in black fool
- If you come to visit
- You'll be bored to tears
- We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years
- But we ain't really quaint
- So please don't point and stare
- Were just technologically impaired
- There's no phone no lights no motorcar
- Not a single luxury
- Like robinson caruso
- It's as primitive as can be
- We been spending most our lives
- Living in an amish paradise
- Were just plain and simple guys
- Living in an amish paradise
- There's no time for sin and vice
- Living in an amish paradise
- We don't fight we all play nice
- Living in an amish paradise
- Hitching up the buggy churning lots of butter
- Raised a barn on monday soon I'll raise anutter
- Think youre really righteous
- Think youre pure in heart
- Well I know I'm a million time
- As humble as thou art
- I'm the pious guy the little amlettes wanna be like
- On my knees day and night scorin points for the afterlife
- So don't be vain and don't be whiny
- Or else my brother
- I might have to get medieval on your heinie
- We been spending most our lives
- Living in an amish paradise
- Were all crazy mennonites
- Living in an amish paradise
- There's no cops or traffic lights
- Living in an amish paradise
- But you'd probably think it bites
- Living in an amish paradise
- Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh
- Ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-ahh-yech
Come to join my duet!
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